July 17, 2007
When you are stuck in the middle
I’m the middle child of 3 girls and seem to always find myself in situations where I’m stuck in the middle. Perhaps I create situations where I’m comfortable being in the middle because I have a skill that helps me understand both sides clearly. But sometimes I get myself into trouble because I understand both sides all too well and then we get nowhere.
I can look at this in a positive light as being the glue in keeping something together or in a negative way as the one who gets lost in the shuffle.
That’s why I find birth order to be so facinating and found a table showing some of the birth order character traits, both bad and good, associated with first, middle, last-born, and only children.
| First | Middle | Last | Only |
|---|---|---|---|
| Natural Leader | Flexible | Risk-taker | Close to parents |
| High Achiever | Easy-going | Outgoing | Self-control |
| Organized | Social | Creative | Leader |
| On-time | Peacemakers | Self-centered | Mature |
| Know-it-all | Independent | Financially irresponsible | Dependable |
| Bossy | Secretive | Competitive | Demanding |
| Responsible | May feel life is unfair | Bored easily | Unforgiving |
| Adult-pleaser | Strong negotiator | Likes to be pampered | Private |
| Obeys the rules | Generous | Sense of humor | Sensitive |
What about when we are stuck in the middle in a sales situation? When you have a client or a prospect who really wants something and your manager doesn’t agree with that request? What about when you are working with a field partner and a customer who see things in a different way than you do and clearly do not include you?
Today, partnering is more important than ever before and learning how to build and manage collaborative partnerships is essential to your success. When you are in the middle, you can actually make things happen, negotiate with strength and execute so it’s a win-win situation for all.
Take the high road when partnering and become the faciliatator by listening to the needs surrounding you and helping articulate it for the rest. Use the positive aspects of being the in middle and not the negative.
And for all you middle kids out there- keep up the great work in your efforts to balance and create harmony in all situations. I can’t think of any other birth order that I rather be than middle.


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