My talented friend Martha called me a few days ago for some career advise. She worked for me many years ago and was instumental in helping design the TeleSmart 10 methodology. She is one of those gifted and talented women who understands so much more than you cound ever explain. My adivse to her- start your own blog. That is my answer to everything these days:

When people want to know what I’m up to and where I’m traveling- I say, read my blog

When someone is going through a career transition and feels underutilized- I suggest to start a blog

When a salesperson is prospecting for new business- I recommend, read your prospects’ blog

When management wants to get their people thinking on the same page- I  suggest to start a blog

When the solo entrepreneur wants to showcase their work- I  suggest to start a blog

When you want to reach out and meet thought leaders who go to Davos, Switzerland- Start spreading blog love

When you want to strike up a conversation at a blogging conference- Tell them  you blog

When people ask me where do I begin, I suggest they look at my blogroll and here is my top 10 favorite blog sites that range from marketing, business, spiritual, gossip, technology, sales and life. Here is the list-

1. 37 days- Patti Digh’s blog doesn’t always inspire me to blog because I’m intimidated by her writing eloquence but she inspires me to be the best person I can be. What would you do if you only had 37 days to live? Read her blog.

2. Build a Better Blog- These clever ladies call themselves the Blog Squad and they know what’s going on and keep crankin out excellent content. They are like StrideRite shoes for the first time walker- only it’s blogging for the first timers.

3. Scobleizer- Remember I mentioned Davos? Well Robert Scoble who is now with Fast Company is there interviewing pretty cool people- most are from Silicon Valley—– so I say, why fly to Switzerland?

4. DuckTapeMarketing- John Jantsch gets it from a marketing perspective and he is always generous with great content. Just yesterday, he participated in a great podcast/webinar with Seth Godin and Chris Anderson.

5. Beach Walks with Rox- It’s freezing, my heater is blasting and I’ve got 3 layers of wool. Roxanne Darling makes it happen on the beach in Hawaii- very cool and relaxing. Each day, she records a live segment.

6. Church of the Customer-Ben and Jackie make such a complementary partnership as they observe life through their astute marketing eyes.

7. CopyBlogger- This is a blog I need to look at more often . Brian Clark will also be at San Francisco’s Elite Retreat in April and if I had $5,000 to spend, I would book this now. 

8. Selling to Big Companies- Jill Konrath has one of the better sales blogs out there- we need to stick together, don’t we Jill?

9. Salesopedia- Clayton is building a great site and bringing a sales community together.

10. PerezHilton- I’m sorry, this is my guilty pleasure and time sink- what can I say. I have to admit, there’s way too much on Britney in his blog.

How many times do you get excited about something and run it by someone who responds with “it will never work” or “I have a better idea” or “we’ve tried it before and it never happened?”  It’s like hearing stop, no, turn around.

These responses may come from people who are close to you and know you well such as a good friend, a business associate, your child, significant other, a parent or your boss. It’s not so much what they say but more what you start to believe and how worthless you begin to feel.

Although they may not do it intentionally and believe they are trying to help by claiming their know what is good for you, it’s their efforts that can neutralize yours. I see this happening all the time and yet we surrender our power to this. Why? Because we are comfortable? We believe it?

Wake up that flame inside you and push back when you hear NO by asking why and why not.

It’s been 18 months and 388 blog posts since I first ventured into the blogsphere. Today, my writing life is full and my blog is my business partner, my confidante, my inspiration and my mirror. 

Why do I blog? Mainly because I love to write and communicate my thoughts, ideas and values to the world.  I like to get up close and personal with inside sales people as well as field sales, service and support teams.

Sometimes I think I’m moving very slow on a highway that is racing. Other times, I feel I’m speeding in a 25 miles per hour zone. Today I am going at exactly the right pace.

I want to dedicate this blog posting to YOU. Thanks for stopping by and reading a post or two, thanks for the time you take to read and comment, thanks for your kind words of support and most of all, thanks for being my inspiration. 

I have compiled my top 50 list of favorite blog post- here is the best of the Life in the Telebusiness Blog:

1. Setting Appointments.

2.  Get More Live Voices

3. Change up your messaging

4. Oops, when you realize you’re in the wrong place

5. When someone goes radio silent on you

6. 5 ways to set your non-negotiable time

7. The Dynamic Duo

8. Keep in shape

9. Clues we lose

10. Telestressed?

11. 8 reasons to test your phone courage

12. Email rejections

13. Changes lead to uncertainty of power

14. Listening for red flags

15. Are any No-Po’s lingering in your forecast?

16. Learning your No-Po lacks power before they do

17. Betrayed by No-Po’s?

18. I just have one more question

19. When a No-Po has to protect their turf

20. Winning coaching qualities

21. Are you avoiding being coached?

22. Sales intuition

23. The cancelled sales appointment

24. Is voice mail in or out?

25. Key words and phrases that lack influence

26. Trend talk

27. Sales training is like going into rehab

28. The first few times it’s tough and then it gets easier

29. Are salespeople happy?

30. Notes on motivation

31. Mr. Unavailable is a No-Po

32. Sales yoga

33. Tuesday conversation with a No-Po

34. You finally get the appointment, now what?

35. Let’s talk about trust

36. Different messages= different titles

37. End of quarter sales stats

38. Watch out- it’s the No-Po entourage

39. You sound busy so I’ll let you go

40. 10 tactics for engaging a gate-keeper

41. Looking for motivation in all the wrong places

42. Unavailable power

43. When was the last time you…..

44. Sales 2.0 prospecting

45. Opt-out of desperate discounting

46. The 3 C’s of social networking

47. Sales 2.0; A Report from the front lines

48. Top 7 responses impatient salespeople hate to hear

49. What’s on your wish list?

50. Why do we can people who have no power?

I have a lot of empathy for Sales Training Directors. They are chartered with a big task they must execute on and their reputation is on the line. The worst part is they are hounded by these aggressive, slimey, pushy, arrogant, sales training vendors that stalk them on a daily basis. Of course, I’m not included in that pack- I don’t even own a grey trenchcoat:)

Since Inside Sales is on the radar, every training company wants to offer curriculum for this audience. However, not many know enough about this unique demographic. The major training vendors out there are saying, oh yeah we have a telesales track. And they pull it out of the bag like it’s a new Rolex watch they are selling or a Kate Spade knock-off. You can’t do it and get away with it. Especially when you are surrounded by inside sales champions who can be the toughest audience.

So, I’ve desiged a 20-question checklist that sales training directors can ask when they are sourcing a vendor:

1. Does this vendor have a strong understanding of inside sales? From a department and infrastructure perspective and understands how to sell from various models — inbound, outbound, direct, and indirect?
2. Does this vendor deliver telephone sales skills that demonstrate a required set of action-oriented behaviors — far more than merely “etiquette on the phone?”
3. Does this vendor offer a wide variety of curriculum skills that span throughout the entire sales cycle and not just questioning or closing skills?
4. Does this vendor offer both on-line (email) and phone curriculum since inside sales is focused on both?
5. Does this vendor offer shorter training modules so your teams are not taken off the phones for long periods of time and can retain more information when it is delivered in smaller byte-sized pieces?
6. Does this vendor incorporate call recordings into the training?
7. Does this vendor design training for maximum skills retention and coaching to accelerate selling effectiveness - immediately?
8. Does this vendor design training programs for inside sales managers who came from being an individual contributor and now must drive revenue with their team?
9. Does this vendor have a credible track record of being on the front-line of inside sales for 15-20 years?
10. Does this training vendor have a client list which includes inside sales training as their primary offering and not field sales or customer service?
11. Does this vendor have a client list that demonstrates ROI success in the high-tech sector?
12. Does this vendor demonstrate the personalized, consultative, flexible and knowledgeable approach?
13. Does this vendor understand how to provide highly interactive, energetic topics for sales audiences which usually have a 10-second attention span?
14. Does this vendor have a strong global presence and understand how to differentiate between skills and culture differences?
15. Does this vendor require minimal supervision and can they hit the ground running with timely and relevant training?
16. Does this vendor have a strong understanding of the various sales training methodologies and provide a complementary tactical solution?
17. Does this vendor offer a new hire training track and realizes the pressures of faster ramp-up time today?
18. Does this vendor customize curriculum for you and not provide you with off-the-shelf dated material?
19. Does this vendor understand the unique nuances and skill requirements in developing inside sales talent?
20. Does this vendor “walk their talk” in terms of developing their own business?

I was talking with an Inside Sales Director yesterday about a meeting she had just had with one of her team members. She had called him into her to office because she was ready to put him on plan. As they reviewed his forecast together, she listened to his status updates and excuses on not hitting his numbers. He was defensive and it felt like a conversation they’ve had many times before. At that point, she tuned in to her intuition to realize there was something else going on behind his behavior. She quickly adjusted her approach and came in with razor sharp timing and asked him, what is really going on with you these days?  Well, before she knew it, his eyes welled up with tears and he shared some personal information about his life that was severely impacting his sales. That’s compassionate coaching. We can get results a lot faster when we invest in listening to the other person instead of focusing on our agenda.

There are a lot of good coaches out there. Here are some winning qualities they share:

Excellent Listening–This is key and it must be active, empathetic, compassionate and non-defensive. Learn to effectively paraphrase what you hear.

Patience–People don’t change but behaviors can change; everyone has his or her own unique rhythm that takes time.

Supportiveness–Sometimes team members are just waiting for permission to be seen as the top dog on the team. Treat them like they deserve to be in that spot.

Flexibility and Adaptability–Managers must become agile in how they manage because every person is different. They must keep an open mind and become sensitive to differences.

Interest and Awareness–Take time to walk into team members’ cubicles and look around. Get to know their world because this will give you clues to what motivates them.

Perception–This is where your intuition kicks in. Trust it.

Energetic–A good coach motivates someone to change for the better.

Some salespeople hide when it’s time for their coaching session.

Granted, a coaching relationship can be very revealing as it gets ”up close and personal.” A good coach digs deep to understand not so much how the salesperson is selling but his or her motivation, values and past experiences. But if we’ve received some negative coaching in the past, the experience may have marked us, which explains why we may be resistant to coaching. Here is a checklist to determine if you are avoiding being coached:

1. Defensive behavior–It is difficult to listen to any type of constructive feedback when we are defensive or come from a place where we are panicked.

2. Know-it-all–Just giving lip-service that you will change your behavior isn’t enough.

3. Comfort zone–Just because something has always worked in the past doesn’t mean you can’t try somethinig new.

4. Perception versus Reality–When your perception is so distorted that you refuse to listen to another point of view.

5. Low self-esteem–Our confidence takes a beating when we are out there making calls and this impacts our productivity. 

Look at coaching as a gift. If someone takes the time to learn about you and help you develop, that is valuable. Tomorrow, we’ll discuss qualities that make a good coach. Please submit your comments on this.  

How compassionate is our coaching today?

Listen to our lively discussion with Lisa Gauger, Harte-Hanks training and quality specialist and with Pawel Andrzejczak, Cisco’s training manager.

They share their insights on benefits of coaching, qualities of a good coach and trends in coaching.

Find out what it takes for managers and trainers to approach their coaching with more compassion.